Happy VERY belated Valentine’s Day weirdos! This is about three weeks late but honestly you don’t need a lovey-dovey holiday to celebrate the slashers some of us find hot for reasons we cannot explain. Normally I’d do more exposition to lead into a listicle like this but since this is just for fun and half a joke/half serious (I’ve been asking my friends for months their pick for Hottest Slashers) I’m too excited to beat around the bush. So without further ado here is the (forever incomplete) list of HOTTEST HORROR MOVIE SLASHER VILLAINS.
(The pictures aren't all even because it was very hard finding ones that matched in size, apologies in advance if it makes the post read weird!)
SPOILERS AHEAD!
Leslie Vernon - Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon (2004 dir. Scott Glosserman)
Leslie Vernon is the one true love of my life. He’s charming, charismatic, and truly a man dedicated to his cause. You can’t help but fall in love with Leslie over the course of the film even though you know things won’t end well; for him and everyone involved. But he’s made of 100% boyfriend material! Played by the adorably handsome Nathan Baesel, he worked hard to make you fall for Leslie even as you watch him gear up to kill a group of rowdy teenagers. But somehow you still end up rooting for him because he's arguably the most human slasher on this list.
Harry Warden - My Bloody Valentine (1981 dir. George Mihalka)
Ladies love a hardworking man, right? Okay maybe this isn’t quite their definition of hardworking but it’s mine! No Valentine’s Day is complete without Harry Warden! While he seems intimidating at first in all the miner gear it isn’t long before you’re giving him your heart (get it?). Okay I know how weird this sounds but trust me, I’m not the only one out there that’s just a little thirsty for the slasher boys.
Ghostface - Scream 1 & 2 (1996 & 1997 dir. Wes Craven)
Okay this one’s not weird because you if you make someone watch Scream 1 and 2 and they tell you afterwards they didn’t fall deeply in love with Billy, Stu, and Mickey they're either lying or in denial. It’s impossible to not love them because these actors knew exactly what they were doing when they played these roles. No one is immune to Skeet Ulrich licking fake blood off his hands and quoting Psycho. And Timothy Olyphant as Mickey Altieri? He’s very supremely dreamy. NOTE: This article does not acknowledge Ghostface (Roman) in Scream 3 because uh, I don’t want to.
Bo Sinclair - House of Wax (2005 dir. Jaume Collet-Serra)
A southern gentleman who is also a talented artist? And he runs his own successful business with his twin brother? What could be better! He does have a bit of an angry streak so it's probably best to stay on his good side. But hey, if he doesn’t turn you into one of the figures for his wax museum he can at least fix your car.
Michael Myers - Halloween (franchise, multiple directors)
The definition of the “strong and silent” type. Michael is one of the original slashers we love to, well, love. He’s a simple man who loves Halloween and long walks at night. Sure he’s a little mysterious and you won’t get many words out of him but that only makes him more intriguing, right? It’s hard not to want to know more about this iconic masked slasher. Maybe over pumpkin pie? And don't worry about utensils, he'll bring the knife.
Candyman - Candyman (1992 dir. Bernard Rose)
By far the most underrated slasher on this list, The Candyman (aka Daniel Robitaille) always deserves more love. Played by the electrifying (and handsome!) Tony Todd, I have a deep, deep love and appreciation for this terrifying boogeyman. And what’s not to appreciate? He loves bees, has a sick hook for a hand, and can keep you warm in his luxurious coat! In all seriousness Candyman is one of the greatest horror movies ever made and should be required viewing for all horror fans. All he wants is for you to be his victim.
Brahms Heelshire - The Boy (2016 dir. William Brent Bell)
This is my "wildcard" entry and by far the weirdest one on this list. There’s really no explaining myself without sounding even more strange than it already is so if you’ve seen the movie then you know who Brahms is and I guess I’m just a sucker for sweaty cardigan-wearing masked slashers. That’s really all I can say besides this is mostly a shout-out to my friends in the slasher community who really love Brahms.
There you have it folks! Some of the hottest slashers we have as chosen by myself and some of my horror friends! Although there are many that I’ve excluded, so keep your eyes peeled for a part 2! I also hope this gave you a good laugh because I was dying as I was writing it. Also if you liked it, maybe give it a share? That would be super rad.